July 27, 2006

A handful of relatively uninteresting points which, in the aggregate, one might charitably consider blogworthy

My blogging arm is kind of rusty, but here goes:

(1) I recently took the bar exam in Albany, NY. I decided to drive up, both as a means of clearing my head before the test and because I forgot to buy a plane ticket. The weather on the drive was great, and I had the top down on my car for most of the drive. Tossing my shirt amidst the CDs, Dr. Pepper bottles, gas receipts, and stray sunflower seeds on the passenger seat, I managed to get a pretty good tan.

In fact, I look pretty great, given my numerous genetic deficiencies. Tuesday evening, after day one of the bar, I looked in the mirror and realized this was the first time I've ever felt more attractive than intelligent. Sweet god I hope it's not the last.

(2) Albany isn't that bad. In a different world, it's the kind of town I could see myself going to a bar, getting drunk by myself, and returning alone to my hotel to masturbate in.

(3) Being in New York reminded me of something my dad asked me about once. It's difficult to describe in print why this was so hilarious, but I'll try anyway.

"You know, people say 'Empire State' different than they say 'Empire State Building'. With 'Empire State', the emphasis is at the beginning. EMpire State. But with Empire State Building, they say 'Empire STATE Building'. You never hear anyone say 'EMpire State Building'. Or 'Empire STATE'. But one of them has got to be right, doesn't it? Which means the other one has to be wrong. I wonder which one it is. Have you ever thought about this?"

The worst part? I had thought about this. And I still do. A lot.

1 comment:

  1. And why does no one ever say 'Dogpire State Building' or 'Empire Dog Building'?

    ReplyDelete